# # The Corporate Bullshit Generator (CBSG) # # Sources: # # - personal notes from long years of professional experience # - new words from the Internet by feeding a search # engine with sentences of the generator # - very valuable, appreciated and proactive contributions # from my colleagues and friends, especially: # Mili Eppler, Nigel Findlater, Emilio Nualart, # Bernhard Maertl, Paul Della Marta, Georges Modol, # Andrew Fox, Kurt Dickmann, Georg Bauhaus, Frederic Praca, # David Malinge # - high-level, responsive empowerments by Ludovic Brenta # # Legal licensing note: # # Copyright (c) Gautier de Montmollin 2006 .. 2016 # CH-8810 Horgen # SWITZERLAND # # Permission is hereby granted, free of charge, to any person obtaining a copy # of this software and associated documentation files (the "Software"), to deal # in the Software without restriction, including without limitation the rights # to use, copy, modify, merge, publish, distribute, sublicense, and/or sell # copies of the Software, and to permit persons to whom the Software is # furnished to do so, subject to the following conditions: # # The above copyright notice and this permission notice shall be included in # all copies or substantial portions of the Software. # # THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS", WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR # IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, # FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE # AUTHORS OR COPYRIGHT HOLDERS BE LIABLE FOR ANY CLAIM, DAMAGES OR OTHER # LIABILITY, WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, TORT OR OTHERWISE, ARISING FROM, # OUT OF OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE SOFTWARE OR THE USE OR OTHER DEALINGS IN # THE SOFTWARE. # # NB: this is the MIT License, as found 12-Sep-2007 on the site # http://www.opensource.org/licenses/mit-license.php # [boss-managing] Managing Acting General [boss-title-vice] Vice Corporate Vice [boss-title-co] Co- [boss-title] Director Chief Head President Supervisor Manager pragma prefix-with [boss-title] [boss-title-co] [boss-title-vice] [boss-age] Senior Junior [boss-exec] Executive Principal [boss-groupal] Group Global Local [boss-department-1] Human Resources Controllers Internal Audits Legal Operations Management Offices Customer Relations Client Leadership Client Relationships Business Planning Business Operations IT Strategy IT Operations Marketing Strategic Planning Facilities Management Innovation Identity Branding Diversity and Inclusion [boss-department-2] Visionary Digital Technical Manifesto [boss-department] <^4> [boss-department-1] [boss-department-2] [boss-officer] Catalyst Futurist <^3> Officer [boss-dept-of] of [boss-department-1] [boss-type-1] [boss-title] pragma suffix-with [boss-type-1] [boss-dept-of] pragma prefix-with [boss-type-1] [boss-managing] [boss-exec] pragma prefix-with [boss-type-1] [boss-age] [boss-type-2] Chief pragma prefix-with [boss-type-2] [boss-groupal] pragma suffix-with [boss-type-2] [boss-department] [boss-officer] [boss] [boss-type-1] [boss-type-2] pragma export-rule [boss] [thing-atom-inner] mission vision guideline roadmap timeline [matrix-or-so] win-win-solution baseline starting point sign-off escalation system Management Information System Quality Management System planning target calibration Control Information System process talent execution leadership performance solution provider value value creation feedback document bottom line momentum opportunity credibility issue core meeting platform niche content communication goal skill alternative culture requirement potential challenge empowerment benchmarking framework benchmark implication integration enabler control trend business case architecture action plan project review cycle trigger event strategy formulation decision enhanced data capture energy plan initiative priority synergy incentive dialogue concept time-phase projection 009: blended approach eak phrases low hanging fruit forward planning pre-plan pipeline bandwidth brand image paradigm paradigm shift strategic staircase cornerstone executive talent evolution workflow message risk/return profile efficient frontier pillar internal client consistency on-boarding process dotted line action item cost efficiency channel convergence infrastructure metric technology relationship partnership supply-chain portal solution business line white paper scalability innovation Strategic Management System Balanced Scorecard differentiator case study idiosyncrasy benefit say/do ratio segmentation image realignment business model business philosophy business platform methodology profile measure measurement philosophy branding strategy efficiency industry commitment perspective risk appetite best practice brand identity customer centricity shareholder value attitude mindset flexibility granularity engagement pyramid market diversity interdependency scaling asset flow charting value proposition performance culture change reward learning next step delivery framework structure support structure standardization objective footprint transformation process policy sales target ecosystem landscape atmosphere environment core competency market practice operating strategy insight accomplishment correlation touchpoint knowledge transfer correlation capability gamification smooth transition leadership strategy collaboration success factor lever breakthrough open-door policy recalibration wow factor onboarding solution brand pyramid dashboard branding local-for-local strategy cross-sell message up-sell message divisional structure value chain microsegment rollout plan leadership development system architectural approach brand value milestone co-innovation speedup validation [thing-atom-single] [timeless-event] team building focus strategy planning granularity core business implementation intelligence change management ROE EBITDA enterprise content management excellence trust respect openness transparency Quality Research decision making risk management enterprise risk management leverage diversification successful execution effective execution selectivity optionality expertise awareness broader thinking client focus thought leadership quest for quality ak phrases 360-degree thinking drill-down impetus fairness intellect emotional impact emotional intelligence adaptability stress management self-awareness strategic thinking cross fertilization cross-breeding customer experience centerpiece SWOT analysis responsibility accountability ROI line of business serviceability responsiveness simplicity portfolio shaping knowledge sharing continuity visual thinking interoperability compliance teamwork self-efficacy decision-making line-of-sight scoping line-up predictability recognition investor confidence competitive advantage uniformity connectivity big picture big-picture thinking quality upside focus sustainability resiliency social sphere intuitiveness effectiveness competitiveness resourcefulness informationalization role building talent retention innovativeness Economic Value Creation intellectual capital high quality full range of products technical strength quality assurance specification quality market environment client perspective solution orientation client satisfaction integrity reputation time-to-market innovative edge book value growth global network ability to deliver active differentiation solid profitability core capacity digital economy white-collar productivity white-collar efficiency governance corporate governance business development corporate identity attractiveness design philosophy global footprint risk taking focus on speed business equation edge ownership competitive success discipline knowledge management ability to move fast franchise global reach integrativeness customer footprint time-to-value efficacy DNA dedication ingenuity [thing-atom-inner] [thing-atom-plural] key target markets style guidelines key performance indicators market conditions market forces market opportunities tactics organizing principles interpersonal skills roles and responsibilities cost savings lessons learned client needs requests / solutions mobile strategies expectations and allocations workshops dynamics options aspirations # @TODO # Once we get plural support, add inner plurals [thing-atom] [thing-atom-single] [thing-atom-plural] [matrix-or-so] organization silo matrix cube sphere [timeless-event] kick-off roll-out client event quarter results [person-single-spec] steering comittee group project manager [thing-atom] champion community sales manager enabler powerful champion thought leader gatekeeper resource senior support staff brand manager category manager account executive project leader product manager naming committee executive comittee white-collar workforce innovator game changer visionary [person-single] <^2> [person-single-spec] [boss] [person-plural] key people human resources customers clients resources team players enablers stakeholders standard-setters partners business leaders thinkers/planners white-collar workers board-level executives key representatives innovators policy makers pioneers game changers [person] [person-single] [person-plural] [thing-adjective] efficient strategic constructive proactive strong key global corporate cost-effective focused top-line credible agile holistic new adaptive optimal unique core compliant goal-oriented non-linear problem-solving prioritizing cultural future-oriented potential versatile leading dynamic progressive non-deterministic informed leveraged challenging intelligent controlled educated non-standard underlying centralized decentralized reliable consistent competent prospective collateral functional tolerably expensive organic forward-looking next-level executive seamless spectral balanced effective integrated systematized parallel responsive synchronized compatible carefully thought-out cascading high-level siloed operational future-ready flexible movable right productive evolutionary overarching documented awesome coordinated aligned enhanced control-based industry-standard accepted agreed-upon target customer-centric wide-spectrum well-communicated cutting-edge best-in-class state-of-the-art verifiable solid inspiring growing market-altering vertical emerging differentiating integrative cross-functional measurable well-planned accessible actionable accurate insightful relevant long-term top tactical best-of-breed robust targeted personalized interactive streamlined transparent traceable far-reaching powerful improved executive-level goal-based top-level value-added value-adding streamlining time-honored idiosyncratic sustainable in-depth immersive cross-industry time-phased day-to-day present-day medium-to-long-term profit-maximizing generic granular values-based value-driven well-defined outward-looking scalable strategy-focused promising collaborative scenario-based principle-based vision-setting client-oriented long-established established organizational visionary trusted full-scale firm-wide fast-growth performance-based high-performing high-performance cross-enterprise outsourced situational bottom-up multidisciplinary one-to-one goal-directed intra-organisational high-performing multi-source 360-degree motivational differentiated solutions-based compelling structural go-to-market on-message adequate value-enhancing mission-critical business enabling transitional future game-changing enterprise-wide rock-solid bullet-proof superior genuine alert nimble phased selective macroscopic low-risk high-yield interconnected high-margin resilient high-definition well-crafted fine-grained context-aware multi-tasked feedback-based analytics-based fact-based usage-based multi-channel omni-channel pre-approved specific heart-of-the-business responsible socially conscious results-centric business-led well-positioned end-to-end high-quality siloed modular service-oriented competitive scale-as-you-grow outside-in hyper-hybrid long-running large-scale wide-ranging active stellar dramatic aggressive innovative high-powered above-average result-driven innovation-driven customized outstanding non-mainstream customer-facing consumer-facing unified cooperative laser-focused well-implemented diversifying market-changing metrics-driven pre-integrated solution-oriented impactful world-class turn-key leading-edge next-generation extensible under-the-radar high-grade structured trust-based intra-company inter-company profit-oriented sizeable highly satisfactory bi-face tri-face disruptive technological marketplace fast-evolving open fully networked adoptable trustworthy science-based non-manufacturing multi-divisional controllable high-priority market-driven market-driving ingenious business-for-business inspirational winning boundaryless reality-based customer-focused preemptive location-specific revealing inventory-planning ubiquitous number-one results-oriented socially enabled well-scoped insight-based high-impact technology-driven knowledge-based information-age technology-centered critical cognitive acculturated client-centric comprehensive ground-breaking long-standing accelerating forward-thinking mind-blowing jaw-dropping transformative better-than-planned vital radical expanding fierce single-minded mindful top-down hands-on one-on-one analytic [growth-superlative] organic double-digit upper single-digit breakout unprecedented unparalleled proven measured xchange fads sustained sustainable robust solid rock-solid healthy incremental significant recurring sizeable rapid breakneck profitable disciplined accelerated impressive [growth+percent] [growth+percent] [1..20] [1..20] % [growth-improvement] growth improvement throughput increase efficency gain yield enhancement expansion productivity improvement gain in task efficency shift in value increase in margins cost reduction [growth] [growth-superlative] [growth-improvement] pragma export-rule [growth] [thing-with-adj] <^3> [thing-adjective] , [thing-adjective] [thing-atom] <^3> [thing-adjective] and [thing-adjective] [thing-atom] <^4> [thing-adjective] [thing-atom] <^2> [thing-adjective] and/or [thing-adjective] [thing-atom] [growth] <^2> [thing-adjective] [thing-adjective] [thing-adjective] [thing-atom] [thing] [thing-with-adj] [thing-atom] pragma export-rule [thing] [bad-things] issues intricacies organizational diseconomies black swans challenging market conditions inefficiencies overlaps known unknowns unknown unknowns soft cycle issues obstacles surprises weaknesses threats barriers to success barriers shortcomings problems uncertainties unfavorable developments consumer/agent disconnects underperforming areas information overloads concerns shortfalls limitations downtimes headwinds subpar returns gaps market gaps [eventual-adverb-1] interactively credibly quickly proactively 200% 24/7 globally culturally technically strategically swiftly cautiously expediently organically carefully significantly conservatively adequately genuinely efficently seamlessly consistently diligently dramatically straightforwardly differentially gradually aggressively [eventual-adverb] <^3> {empty} [eventual-adverb-1] [random-article] the our <^4> a <^4> an {empty} [eventual-postfix-adverb-1] going forward within the industry across the board in this space from the get-go at the end of the day throughout the organization as part of the plan by thinking outside the box using [random-article] [thing] by leveraging [random-article] [thing] taking advantage of [random-article] [thing] within the [matrix-or-so] acroos the [matrix-or-so] across and beyond the [matrix-or-so] resulting in [random-article] [growth] reaped from our [growth] as a consequence of [random-article] [growth] because [random-article] [thing] produce [growth] ahead of schedule , relative to our peers on a transitional basis by expanding boundaries by nurturing talent , as a tier 1 company up-front on-the-fly across our portfolio 50/50 up, down, and across the [matrix-or-so] in the marketplace by thinking and acting beyond boundaries at the individual, team and organizational level ensuring [random-article] [thing] over the long term across geographies in the core across industry sectors across the wider Group , paving the way for [random-article] [thing] [eventual-postfix-adverb] [eventual-postfix-adverb-1] <^4> {empty} pragma export-rule [eventual-postfix-adverb-1] [person-verb-thing] manage target streamline improve optimize achieve secure address boost deploy innovate right-scale formulate transition leverage focus on synergize generate analyse integrate empower benchmark learn adapt enable strategize prioritize eak phrases pre-prepare deliver champion embrace enhance engineer envision incentivize maximize visualize whiteboard institutionalize promote overdeliver right-size rebalance re-imagine influence facilitate drive structure standardize accelerate deepen strengthen broaden enforce establish foster build differentiate take a bite out of table flesh out reach out jump-start co-create capitalize on calibrate re-aggregate articulate iterate reinvest in potentiate [person-verb-badthing] address identify avoid mitigate minimize [thing-verb-thing] streamline interact with boost generate impact enhance leverage synergize generate empower enable prioritize transfer drive result in promote influence facilitate aggregate architect cultivate engage structure standardize accelerate deepen strengthen enforce foster turbocharge granularize operationalize reconceptualize iterate revolutionise [thing-verb-person] motivate target enable drive synergize empower prioritize incentivise inspire transfer promote influence strength energize invigorate [person-verb-def-ending] streamline the process address the overarching issues benchmark the portfolio manage the cycle figure out where we come from, where we are going to maximize the value execute the strategy think out of the box think differently think across the full value chain loop back conversate go forward together achieve efficiencies deliver stay in the mix stay in the zone evolve exceed expectations develop the plan develop the blue print for execution grow and diversify fuel changes nurture talent cultivate talent make it possible manage the portfolio align resources drive the business forward make things happen stay ahead outperform peers surge ahead manage the downside stay in the wings come to a landing shoot it over move the needle connect the dots connect the dots to the end game reset the benchmark take it offline peel the onion drill down get from here to here do things differently stretch the status quo challenge the status quo challenge established ideas increase customer satisfaction enable customer interaction manage the balance turn every stone drive revenue rise to the challenge keep it on the radar stay on trend hunt the business down push the envelope to the tilt execute on priorities stand out from the crowd make the abstract concrete manage the mix grow accelerate the strategy enhance the strength create long-term value meet the challenges move the progress forward do the right projects do the projects right do more with less build winning teams deliver on commitments execute deliver see around the corner meet the surge celebrate the success circle back action forward move forward [thing-verb-def-ending] add value deliver maximum impact [thing-verb-ending] <^4> [thing-verb-thing] [random-article] [thing] <^4> [thing-verb-person] the [person] [thing-verb-def-ending] [person-verb-ending] <^3> [person-verb-def-ending] [person-verb-badthing] [random-article] [bad-things] [person-verb-thing] [random-article] [thing] [verbphrase-coll-1] [person-verb-ending] [thing-verb-ending] pragma prefix-with [verbphrase-coll-1] [faukon] pragma suffix-with [verbphrase-coll-1] [eventual-postfix-adverb] pragma export-rule [verbphrase-coll-1] [faukon] we need to we've got to the reporting unit should controlling should we must activate the [matrix-or-so] to pursuing the route will enable us to we will go the extra mile to we are working hard to we continue to work tirelessly and diligently to we will execute to we will sharpen our business models to [proposition] [faukon] [person-verb-ending] [eventual-postfix-adverb] <^3> the [person] [eventual-adverb] [person-verb-ending] <^3> [random-article] [thing] [eventual-adverb] [thing-verb-ending] [eventual-postfix-adverb] [thing] and [thing] [eventual-adverb] [thing-verb-ending] [eventual-postfix-adverb] [thing] , [thing] and [thing] [eventual-adverb] [thing-verb-ending] [eventual-postfix-adverb] there can be no [growth] until we can achieve [random-article] [growth] [thing] challenge us to [person-verb-ending] [thing] is all about [thing] there is no alternative to [thing-atom] the key to [thing-atom-single] is [thing-atom-single] pragma export-rule [proposition] [articulate-proposition-1] [articulate-proposition] ; this is why [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition] ; nevertheless [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition] , whereas [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition] , while [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition] . In the same time, [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition] . As a result, [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition] , whilst [articulate-proposition] [articulate-proposition-2] [articulate-proposition-2] our gut feeling is that [proposition] the point is not merely to [person-verb-ending] . The point is to [person-verb-ending] it's not about [random-article] [thing] . It's about [random-article] [thing] our challenge is not to [person-verb-ending] . Our challenge is to [person-verb-ending] going forward, [proposition] actually, [proposition] [articulate-proposition] <^8> [proposition] [articulate-proposition-1] pragma export-rule [articulate-proposition] [sentence] [articulate-proposition] . pragma export-rule [sentence] [sentences] <^2> <&1..4> [sentence] <^4> <&4..8> [sentence] <&8..12> [sentence] pragma export-rule [sentences] pragma initial-rule [sentences]